I recently read an article about the 3 hats parents need to wear when a child starts to sass. The three hats were detective, teaching, and counselor. I don’t want to go into what I disagree with this article because there is a lot of good information in it. For example, it lists things that should be done in any parent/child relationship; Mutual respect, rules, enforcement, consistency and teaching by example.
Maybe my unrest here is that I don’t think parents should have to juggle any hats. While they gave excellent advice about how to address a child who talks back in anger (acknowledge the feeling), that is not exactly a teaching moment, it is a respectful moment, allowing a child to come out of the fight part of her brain and into a more logical part.
Bottom line, when a child sasses, deal with it immediately by letting her know it is inappropriate. Acknowledge the feeling behind the sass first, whether it is playful, angry or something else. Use your gut and discover the why behind the what, but don’t assume. Keep the lines of communication open despite her best attempts to shut it down.
Your child’s rebellion is a way of asking if you still care enough to enforce the rules.